Forget BOLLYWOOD! Forget "Bend it like Bekham"! Forget "East is East"!

Here is a new genre of Asian film. It's fast! It's violent! And there are no archetypal Asian cheek-pinching-aunties or big song'n'dance numbers. Six Million Dollars has been stolen from Heathrow Airport. Which gang has it? The Asian Holy Smokes, the Triads, The Yardies or the East End "Firm"? And who is trying to take over the Holy Smokes' lucrative cocaine trade (cocaine smuggled in the onion bhajees from the title)?

From the trailers and interviews I've seen and heard this is going to be a must-see film. It will premiere at Cannes this year and then go on general release in June. The only problem might be the certificate, as this is reputed to be a VERY violent film.

Many thanks to Michael Carrington for sending me a CD ROM of material from and about the film, which has enabled me to produce this page.


This ain't BEND IT LIKE BECKHAM... this ain't EAST IS EAST... this is SOUTHALL!

Welcome to London. Home of many creeds and cultures. The modern criminal underworld reflects the diverse races that call London home.

WEST LONDON is ruled by the HOLY SMOKES crime syndicate. At their head is the ruthless Chacha (Jas Vassi). His mob include the psychopathic killer Rocky (Sukie G), the drug addict Abz (Fran Labbe) and the gentleman gangster Jaz (Ashvin Joshi). To enforce his rule over his minions Chacha uses Singh (Manish Patel), his most trusted and ruthless hitman. Although the HOLY SMOKES rule all of West London, their base is Southall, the stronghold of the Asian community.

is the territory of the TRIADS. These ruthless Chinese gangsters will do anything to protect their honour. Leading them is the young Billy Chan (Peter Peralta). An outsider has killed one of his men Li Fung (Alex Fung) and Billy swears vengeance! Among Billy's army of thugs is Ho Lin Wun (Ernesto Leszek) the ruthless assasin who likes to cut his enemies fingers off for pleasure and amusement.

is governed by the YARDIES, the Jamaican mafia. At the head of this notorious crew is Lloyd (Native). This gang lives purely for the day and their motto is 'Live Fast and Die Young!'. Utterly without fear Lloyd hangs with his trusted men Rufus (Richard Angol) and Errol (Charles Udemezue). However, there is a thorn in Lloyds side - His sister, Tia (Jamille Riverol), lives with a rival gangster, Jaz from the Holy Smokes.

is home to the FIRM. The last stronghold of the original Anglo-Saxon cockney gangsters is ruled by Mad Dave (Dave Courtney). They cannot understand how London has come to be ruled by the ethnic mobsters. They will not give up East London without a fight to the death. Mad Dave makes the HOLY SMOKES an offer they cannot refuse but one of his men Big Kev (Peter Rnic) has other ideas.

Someone is muscling on the HOLY SMOKES cocaine deals and they are not amused. Added to this deadly event is the theft of SIX MILLION DOLLARS from Heathrow Airport making an explosive cocktail! Hot on the trail of the missing money is the Metropolitan Police's most corrupt officer Detective Inspector Greaves (Jonathan Reason). It's a roller-coaster ride as THE HOLY SMOKES wage war against the TRIADS, YARDIES and THE FIRM...

who rules LONDON?



Role Artiste Character
Chacha Jass Bassi Holy Smoke Boss 
Jaz Ashvin Kumar Joshi       Holy Smoke
Abz Fran Labbe Holy Smoke
Rocky Sukie Ghajminger Holy Smoke
Singh Manish Patel Holy Smoke
Lloyd Native Yardie Boss
Errol Charles Udemezue Yardie
Rufus Richard Angol Yardie
Tia Jamille Riverol Yardie
Billy Chan Peter Peralta Triad Boss
Li Fung Alex Fung Triad
Ho Lin Wun Ernesto Leszek Triad
Mad Dave Dave Courtney The Firm Boss
Kevin Wiltshire Peter Rnic The Firm
Big Tone Tony Bowden The Firm
DI Greaves Jonathan Reason Detective Inspector
Belly Dancer Patricia Arteaga Chacha's Mistress
Trudy Yasmine Maya Abz's Girlfriend
Kalwe Ines Bougami Chacha's daughter


Director Sarjit Bains
Screenwriter Manish Patel

Sarjit Bains, director, believes he has assembled the best possible cast for TRIADS, YARDIES AND ONION BHAJEES! "After years of watching films stereotyping ethnic minorities the time has come for a NEW viewpoint."

Manish Patel, screenwriter, says: "There seems to be a monopoly on ethnic roles in films and TV. The same faces crop up everywhere. Be it Comedy, Action or Angst - the same old faces - We hope to introduce the movie industry to the REAL talent!"


A review will appear here just as soon as I've seen a review copy of the film.

External review at http://www.thezreview.co.uk/comingsoon/t/triadsyardiesandonionbhajees.htm

"Triads, Yardies and Onion Bahjees" premieres at this year's Cannes Festival.



The Firm
The Holy Smokes meet Holy Smokes
The Triad The Yardies
Dave of the Firm meets Singh of the Smokes
Romeo and Juliette? The Triads torture a rival gang member





British Asian Production Selected for Cannes

Hindustan Times - UK Bureau, London, April 15

The  only film to get an  official selection from Britain for the prestigious Cannes Film Festival 2003 is a British Asian production Triads, Yardies and Onion Bhajees! by Pulp Sanskrit/Shaanti Films.

When Manish Patel, scriptwriter, actor, producer of the film received a letter from the Cannes Film Festival saying his film has been short listed for screening, he could not believe it.

Triads, Yardies and Onion Bhajees! is the first ever film to show the goings on in the gritty underbelly of London's multi-cultural underworld where Indian gangs are getting powerful with each passing day.

Until yesterday in British gangster films like Guy Ritchie's Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, Blacks played comic roles and Indians were only seen behind cash counters in corner shops. In the real world, gun culture is turning to be the biggest problem among Indian and black communities.

Tired of Asians being merely associated with arranged marriages and the consequent identity crisis, young Asians are now vigorously exploring new, relevant themes for films.

"I am tired of seeing films on arranged marriages and identity crisis. We have to make real films," says Manish.

John Trovolta has agreed to come for the screening at Cannes and Kevin Spacy's agent has got in touch showing great interest in the film and its release. This is Manish Patel's first ever feature film and he covets a Cannes release. His dream has come true.

The film has 89 cast members including notorious East London ex gangster Dave Courtney. It also has a spiritual thread running through it and depicts Goddess Kali in some form in every shot in the film.

The story begins in little India with ONCE UPON A TIME IN SOUTHALL...and Manish is planning to do two more films on Indian gang culture in near future to form a trilogy.



Official Website - here you can view a Trailer for the film.

This is Local London - article.

Hell To Pay Babyjuice Express
Triads, Yardies and Onion Bhajees Daddy Fox
Demoniac One in Something
The Dealer Early appearances
  What next?




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